I was uncomfortable doing a shower for my 2nd wedding because I already received gifts for this from my family and I still have them despite the divorce. My family has also told my mother that they feel uncomfortable about it. Additionally, we don't need anything to register for.
FI doesn't care, but FMIL feels shafted about not getting a shower. She could throw one, but the people she would invite that are local are her friends (who arent invited to the wedding) and her aunts and uncles (who'm I have either met once or never and are not a part of our lives). So...awkward.
Someone on the boards suggested we do a "pounding" where everyone brings a pound of something to stock my pantry, or a different kinds of teas, or different spices. I liked that idea, so I talked to my mother about it and she thought that was a good way to gather the women for the symbolic aspect that FMIL is wanting (and that I'd like too) without having the financial factor involved. My mother mentioned it to my grandmother and her family, and they all think that's ludicrous and still uncomfortable to them.
I feel like I should just give up, right? FMIL can have a baby shower in a few years to "complete" her shower needs or whatever, right?
ETA: typo