Groom Dragging his heals don't know where to start!

Re: Groom Dragging his heals don't know where to start!

• Wzz

  March 2013

  if he is paying for 2/3, but you haven't discussed a budget, then how do you know that he is actually pauiong 66% of the wedding costs?
  
  that said, you'll be fine when you figure out a starting point. to me, that is budget. do you know anyone who recently got married, within the last few years? do you know how much their weddings may have cost? that can give you an idea of how much to plan for a budget.
  
  then think of a realistic amount you are willing to spend. THEN think of how long it will take for you and your FI to save that amount. that gives you a timeframe on when to set your wedding date for.
  
  it shoudl get a little easier after that. stupid sound of music songs are in my head right now. let's start at the very beginning, a very good place to start....you know the rest.

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• lyndsay782

  March 2013 edited March 2013

  In Response to Re: Groom Dragging his heals don't know where to start!:
  [QUOTE]stupid sound of music songs are in my head right now. let's start at the very beginning, a very good place to start....you know the rest.
  Posted by Wzz[/QUOTE]
  
  

  Now it's stuck in my head too...  Dang it. 

  
  

  OP: Have you had the financial talk with him?  You need to do that first if you haven't already.  I've pretty detailed about our money, and my FI knew that I'd have an exact amount figured out.  Find out what  your FI is willing ot contribute, and what you can contribute and go from there.

  
  

  And not just 2/3 of the total, but what that total actually is. 

  
  

  EDITED: (To add the last sentence)

  

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• Ella and Pedro

  March 2013

   I don't know where to start, and when I ask my fiance for any opinions or ideas he just says, "I dunno." 
  
  The problem is, nobody really has any concrete information here.  Of course he does not know, you both don't know, really.   You need to make a clear budget based on data not guesses or wishes.  Start with a list of things a wedding includes from your POV:
  
  Dress
  Engagement Ring
  Wedding Rings
  Officiant
  Venue
  Florist
  Tuxedo
  Food/Catering
  Bartender/Alcohol
  Cake
  Music/DJ
  etc.
  
  Now research each of these *in your area* and get quotes from three vendors.  I.E. three officiants (in our area they are an average of $500.00.  I live in an expensive, urban area. Maybe your area has the officiant at a different rate. Maybe it's a specific church you'd use and there is no bidding - but just a question of booking the minister or priest or rabbi, but you get the idea). 
  
  Then, make a wedding binder with a spreadsheet or some other organization of the data and other key points (i.e. the only dates that your specific church or mosque or temple are available) and THAT is what you present to your fiance.
  
  Too much work?  He should do some research too? Fine.  Tell him. Show him.  Ask him.  COMMUNICATE
  
  Good luck!

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